I was standing there at the door, She walked ahead of me to the couch and asked me to sit along. I had not seen her in too long..
we sat there where it was just enough aurora, for us to see eachother’s face, that beautiful view, how could I ever forget..
those eyes I remembered, had me gone crazy when they looked away! She passed me chocolate saying consider it as her birthday cake..
oh well, bad my reflex. I turned down. She has put it on the table with few other chocolates around. She mumbled something, I didn’t catch..
She’s in a room with no one else around but me and She’s not even looking at me. to that I thought, was I not there or shouldn’t have been??
*clears my throat* you knew I was there, every other day ready to hear.. but didn’t so once you tried to hear from me, I said..
I know I know, you were there, you’ve always been. please stop, I don’t want to listen. I’m passed that chapter of life. She says.
you would know when I’m not with you I said, as I wake up from deep sleep and there’s no you…
did you mean these dreams are chapter too?
So, I guess six years is not less of time for one to forget someone .. I had not loved her that entire time, I had not talked to her that entire time, her thoughts may have crossed my mind but never once it came out this hard on me. that night, I slept with my headphones on listening to some old ass song.. I pictured her just as She would be now, in my dream.. She sat next to me in that while, I started saving her face in my mind, She told me She’s independent now but for so many times She has cried..
I wondered why, so I asked her and She says never has She ever got me out of her mind. I’m blown away. How my restless heart managed to believe that I would never understand, and I said, it’s rubbish of you saying that, six years gone you didn’t ask of me once.
She’s exaggerated sorry and She kept it on repeat… all that time I was figuring out the last time I had seen her as She looked entirely different now, She’s grown too strong perhaps or I’ve grown too weak, She tells me She’s engaged again.. I congratulate her with best wishes, I feel nervous break down. She’s been engaged twice and never did She ever think of me to be aware of that. it’s understandable, She’d be thinking I’m moved on too, yes I have, why were we together even if it was just a dream for the love of God…. when will it ever be how it has been?
I asked her, are you happy? she’s looking away.. i asked her again and maybe she didn’t listen, I felt ignored that very moment, I asked her to do me a favor and tell me to leave… she’s insisted for me to stay… no… Khuram don’t leave.. okay, fine but you don’t look away, I’ll show myself out if you do that again i told her…
she told me to not to look at her like that, i might have been staring at her, she had changed so much, she looks as she’s mature as me, I remembered she used to ask me if she should go outside .. that day long gone.. we are not eachother’s time. i realized, so I asked her again are you happy? she didn’t answer any precise resting her head on my shoulder she says I’m not sure, I told her this isn’t right and tries to get up from where we were sitting, she’s feeling embarrassed again… oh God, i hate myself as i start to contemplate again!!
I sit back with her again, She’s started to tell me story of a boy wearing red tie. I knew it was me, it’s been so long, just let it be. I told her… you’re engaged again. you shouldn’t feel the same. look at you, you’re beautiful attractive and strong. Yes i am strong, but I’m not strong on the inside. she says smth like that… why have you been on the outside then if you weren’t on the inside..?
hold that thought right there, she’s told me off, I woke up and there’s no one except me on my bed.